Overcoming Normality

At every stage of life there is a pressure to fit in with the crowd. We feel it whether we’re children, teenagers, young adults, or elderly. This pressure is internal as well as external because most people want to be liked and have a desire to belong. This desire leads people to adopt the thoughts and behaviors of others, typically whatever group is seen as the majority. When you do this, you have adjusted to the norm, and while normality does have some benefits such as a sense of belonging, increased popularity, and less potential for being persecuted by others, it can also feel stifling. Normality can limit personal growth, which is why it is important to think critically about the norms you are following and at times choose to break free from them.

People learn about themselves through their relationships with others, but they also need to experience time alone to aid in their growth as well. Spending time in solitude, away from others, allows the individual to clarify what they really think and feel. It allows them to figure out what makes them unique and different from others. These unique qualities, whatever they may be, are often the foundation from which a person is best able to express their creativity. Recognizing what makes you different also serves as an opportunity to practice self-acceptance. Rather than negatively comparing oneself to others or thinking about the ways they don’t measure up, through compassion a person can come to cherish the qualities they have that others may not possess. Even though it is a difficult task, most of the stories of successful individuals are stories about people who were willing to break away from the norm in order to do what they really wanted to do. 

Overcoming Normality

You overcome normality by setting personal goals that align with your true self and the things you really value. Then you take actions to move closer towards those goals, which might feel scary at first, but as you keep going you start to build more confidence in your ability to take risks and step outside of your comfort zone.

I referenced success stories of people who have done this, and it’s important to also state that their success is not purely individual. People who embark on the journey to become themselves often find that they are met by others all along the path. They are surrounded by like-minded individuals who can provide support that is not based on them being alike, but is based on them being the authentic version of themselves.

Dealing with challenges 

It is not easy to give up the benefits of fully embracing normality. The challenges of doing so have already been outlined–loss of a sense of belonging and popularity, as well as likely persecution from others who don’t understand.

The way to deal with these challenges is to commit to values-based living, making choices that are based on the values you hold most important rather than making them on the basis of what is easy or convenient. This helps a person to become more resilient and to overcome their fears and doubts. Support will come from a group of like-minded individuals, but until it does you have to provide support and validation to yourself, and protect your well-being. Overcoming these challenges is worth it in the long run because in doing so a person truly understands what it means to be fulfilled and happy within themselves.